DO AND DON'T FOR THE MORNING AFTER…

It's a familiar scene in real life—your first date with him, either someone you just met or maybe someone you've known for a while but the two of you have never been on an actual date until now.  The evening went really well, you both had a great time.

Even though you wouldn't normally end up in bed with a guy on the first date, somehow this time is different.  He seemed like a terrific guy and you definitely wanted to see him again.  It's as if the two of you were really meant for each other.  Destiny has brought you together.  Fate has decreed it to be so.

Maybe you go to his place or perhaps you go to your place.  Either way, you end up in bed.  A night of hot sex—in fact, the best sex you've ever had.  Then the cold and occasionally cruel light of dawn hits you with reality.

It's now that dreaded morning after!  Terribly awkward or truly comfortable?  Is he really the right guy for you?

I recently found a list of Do And Don't For The Morning After…ten items on the do list for that comfortable and blissful morning after and ten items on the don't list for that awkward morning after…to let you know if he's really the one for you.

The List Saying 'This Could Be The Guy':

1)  He cooks breakfast, goes on a food run, or makes a pot of coffee without being asked.

2)  He walks your dog.

3)  He likes to get it on in the morning.

4)  He's into showering together.

5)  He makes jokes, but never at the wrong time.

6)  He plays DJ while you're getting dressed.

7)  He warms up his car for you on a cold winter day.

8)  He remembers where you left your earrings last night.

9)  He gives you not one, but two clean towels and wash cloth for your shower.

10) He makes your bed, even if he does a crappy job of it.

The List Saying 'This Definitely Is not The Guy':

1)  He's in a cranky mood and doesn't want to get it on because he's not a morning person.

2)  He wants to know why you don't have a specific brand of gourmet coffee.

3)  He doesn't leave your place until late afternoon even though you've hinted that it's time for him to go.

4)  He's in a rush to leave/get rid of you or is obviously panicked at waking up next to another human.

5)  He won't have breakfast or even a cup of coffee with you and doesn't offer you a thing to eat, not even a glass of water.

6)  He takes forever getting out the door in the morning because first he has to check his email, then he watches Sports Center or some dumb internet videos.

7)  He overdoes it when spritzing that vile smelling cologne.

8)  His shower contains a gnarly-looking loofah his ex-girlfriend left 2 years ago and some kind of questionable soap.

9)  He doesn't take out the trash until it's overflowing and then some so that his apartment smells like the dump.

10) He complains about the comfort of your mattress and pillows.

Anything you'd like to add to the do or don't list? 

Lucky Locations To Visit

Lots of things are said to generate good fortune for the lucky holder—a found penny, a four-leaf clover, and a rabbit's foot (although apparently not all that lucky for the poor rabbit).

There are also various locations around the world that are said to be lucky.  Here's a smattering of lucky locations to visit.

The Blarney Stone in Cork, Ireland:  Found at the top of the ruins of Blarney Castle (a trek up four stories of old worn uneven steep stone steps that provides quite a workout before you get near the famous stone), it has long been held that anyone who kisses the Blarney Stone will be blessed with the gift of great eloquence and powers of persuasion.  BUT, as someone who has been there, let me say that even if you make it up all those steps to the top of the castle, you still have a serious physical challenge remaining in order to actually kiss the Blarney Stone.  :)

Abraham Lincoln in Springfield, Illinois:  In Springfield's Oak Ridge Cemetery is the tomb of our sixteenth president, Abraham Lincoln.  And at that tomb is a large sculpture by Gutzon Borglum, the man responsible for Mt. Rushmore.  For many years, visitors have rubbed Lincoln's nose for good luck.

Winged Figures of the Republic, Nevada:  These thirty-foot-tall Art Deco bronze sculptures are on the Nevada side of Hoover Dam, overlooking the canyon.  Rubbing their toes is said to bless you with good luck.

St. John of Nepomuk in Prague, Czech Republic:  Although there are more than two dozen sculptures along the famed Charles Bridge, only one of them is said to be lucky.  Rubbing the plaque on the statue of St.John of Nepomuk, Archbishop of Prague when he was tortured and thrown in the river in 1393, is supposed to be lucky.

Everard 't Serclaes in Brussels, Belgium:  In 1356, Everard 't Serclaes, a resident of Brussels, saved his city from an attack by the Flemish.  A relief likeness of him is displayed near the Grand Place.  Rubbing it brings good luck.

Schoner Brunnen fountain in Nuremburg, Germany:  A seamless brass ring set into one of the railings surrounding Schoner Brunnen fountain is purported to have the power to make wishes come true, but only if you turn the ring three times.

Laughing Buddha in Hangzhou, China:  The concept of patting a Buddha's belly for luck started in Hangzhou's Lingyin Temple which has been around since 328 AD.  The temple has thousands of Buddhas, but the one visitors love to see is the Laughing Buddha.  Patting his belly will bring wealth, good luck, and prosperity.

Bull Mosaic in Milan, Italy:  Being a bull in Spain does not guarantee you a long or even comfortable life.  But there's one bull in Milan who really has it tough.  The Bull Mosaic on the floor of Italy's Galleria Vittorio Emanuele II is subjected to particularly rough treatment.  It's said to be good luck if you place your heel on the bull's testicles and spin around in a circle.  All I can say is ouch! 

9 UNUSUAL USES FOR VODKA

I came across these interesting little tidbits of household helpful hints and thought I'd share them with you.  Most people agree that vodka doesn't have a smell or taste.  [However, to me it smells and tastes like rubbing alcohol.  Therefore, I find these uses for vodka far more viable than drinking it.  :) ]

Remove a Band-Aid

If you've got a Band-Aid you want to remove without the pain of ripping it off, dab some vodka over the adhesive part so that it comes off with more ease. This method also works with stickers.

Treat Poison Ivy

If you think your skin has come into contact with poison ivy, pour vodka over the affected area immediately. Some say the stronger the alcohol, the better. Rubbing alcohol can also be used.

Freshen Laundry

Spritz some vodka on your clothes to freshen them up. Vodka kills odor-causing bacteria and dries with no smell. Be sure to keep the clothing in a well-ventilated area.

Ease a Toothache

Got a toothache? You should go to the dentist, but until then swish some vodka in your mouth. It will help disinfect the affected area and also numb the pain a little.

Insect Repellent

Pour some vodka into a spray bottle to repel pesky insects. Spray near you or on you, but avoid the eyes!

Keep Flowers Fresh

Mix vodka with a spoonful of sugar or baking soda with water to keep your flowers fresher in the vase for longer.

Tame Frizzy Hair

Mix some vodka into your hair conditioner to tame any frizzy hair and make it shinier. It also might help reduce flakes.

Window Washing

Instead of buying that blue stuff, use vodka to clean your windows. Just mix some cheap, high-proof vodka with water and spray away.

Treat Jellyfish Sting

Stung by a jellyfish? Pour some vodka on it ASAP to disinfect it and calm some of the sting.

Jobs That No Longer Exist—part 2 of 2

Last week we talked about jobs from the past that have already gone by the wayside. And this week in part 2 of 2, we're going to talk about jobs many of which are predicted to be nearly gone in the next 20 years or at least out-of-date.

What education should you get to best position yourself for the coming decade? What line of work should you be in, and which professions have no future and will disappear? What does the brave new world have to offer? Here is a list I came across of jobs predicted to be obsolete in 20 years—some logical, some surprising, some frightening, and some seem a little far-fetched.

Actor: Actors in film and television will be replaced by completely realistic looking animations. CGI (computer generated images) are already fully integrated into movies, television, and even commercials. And we can't forget the current focus on AI (artificial intelligence) changing entertainment, the art world, news, and other facets of everyday life. What's real and what isn't? Will the AI performers be able to project the same emotion into a role that real people do? Real people actors will, of course, exist for a while longer and will probably be performing in many parts of the world simultaneously, through the anticipated widespread use of holograms and similar technology.

Cashier: Many grocery stores, big box stores, and large discount stores already have self-check stands, but that’s just a tradeoff between a cashier doing the job and you doing it yourself, with the claim that it makes your purchasers cheaper. However, the self-check stands do not provide you with a discount for your purchases. Remember when ATMs first became available and we were encouraged to use those machines and told it was a good thing because it would save money? Yet in today's world, we're charged ATM fees if our bank isn't in that ATM network.  In the future, check stands will be fully automated. Just leave your groceries on the conveyer belt and let the robot scanner tally it up many times faster than a human ever could. As a consequence, or so it's claimed, lines will be much less of a nuisance as they become increasingly non-existent.

Construction worker: Construction work can be hazardous, so why should humans risk their lives doing it? In the future, insurance companies certainly won’t cover a construction firm that takes such unnecessary risks. Robotics are becoming increasingly sophisticated, and they’ll be constructing buildings cheaper, and far more rapidly than humans. But will they be as good or as safe?

Soldier: Compared to sophisticated robots, humans are relatively susceptible to mental deficiencies such as nervousness, pride, stupidity, miscalculation, slow reaction time, and basic fatigue. In other words: they say computers can do the same job more efficiently, without risking human life, and without apprehension. This one is surely going to be dependent on perfected artificial intelligence…that instant response to a totally unexpected situation. But at what cost? How can a computer replace any and all instant decisions that require a human input? Not everything is a mathematical calculation.

Security guard: Buy a strong, obedient robot that can see in the dark, never falls asleep on duty, and won’t accept bribes, to protect your home or your business. But again, sometimes that split second response requires a human touch.

Car mechanic: Cars will become too technically complex to repair for humans. Computers and robots will take care of it. Eventually, cars will fix themselves. They've already started driving themselves, but not yet successfully enough to make them truly viable or street legal.

Trash collector: Instead of two unhappy guys tossing trash from a receptacle into the back of the truck, a single fast, strong and highly motivated robot will complete the process in five seconds. [my trash pickup has recently been reduced to a one man operation and that one man is the driver—newly issued trash receptacles, instructions about where/how they are placed at the curb, and trucks with automatic arms that pick up the receptacle and dump the contents into the truck then return the receptacle to the curb except it sometimes ends up in the street on its side]

Assembly line worker: Automakers, textile producers and furniture factories (to mention just a few of the industries) around the world are cutting costs by reducing their number of salary, pension and insurance absorbing employees, and shifting focus to robotic solutions.

Toll booth operator: Many developed countries have already successfully implemented money-and-time saving automatic toll booths with video detection and post payment/subscriptions.

Prostitute: The completely lifelike robot girlfriends will satisfy the demand for carnal services in the future. [the movie Westworld has become reality?]

Nature photographer: Close-ups from inside the lion's cave and year-long stakeouts without the need for food or shelter are the advantages of photographic robots. [but does all this robotic perfection replace the creative and artistic eye contributed by the human element?]

Surgeon: Why let a nervous, shaky doctor with poor eyesight cut you with knives and fool around inside of you, when a steady handed, ice cool and accurate robot can do it instead? Medical malpractice lawsuits cost the American health providers some $30 billion each year. They say that will end.

Pilot: Computerized pilots are not like regular pilots in that they are not prone to human error, i.e. they won't spill coffee on the instrument panels in the cockpit or miscalculate their landing angle. Nor do they need good visibility to fly, as their millimeter-accurate GPS and sensor systems will guide them blindly to their destination. Obviously, they will have to prove their merit before plane passengers, and by extension airlines, can trust them.

Film processor: Even today it seems absurd to have a full time employee engaged in nothing but processing film. In fact, it has become difficult to find a local place to process your film and equally difficult to find a place to purchase 35mm film for your old film camera. And also along those lines, most modern movie theaters are rapidly moving away from film which makes a projectionist also on the track toward being obsolete.

Librarian: Libraries will soon look very different. Why have a library containing 50,000 paper made books when you can have 50 million of them in virtual form, which you can access with your library card and download to your electronic e-reader device in numerous formats. There will not be any need for humans to process the lending of books.

Call center operator: By 2029, when computers are scheduled to match human intelligence, a microchip will call your house and argue that you do, in fact, need flood insurance or to purchase an extended warranty for your car or household appliances. Computer generated robo calls are already a daily nuisance.

News anchor: No mispronunciations, no misunderstandings, no Freudian slips, just a perfectly articulate teleprompter with an attractive face. [some more of the 'no actor' technology of item number 1?] But it does not guarantee that the news will be accurate.

Mailman: Who sends snail-mail these days? Mostly nostalgic pen pals. While we may have a small segment left of the paper mail industry, most of the things we use the mail for are transitioning to or have already moved completely online: Bills, public notices, and business-letters. Although, we’ll still need package delivery at least until nanotechnology enables us to send and download material objects like we send files today, in 30-40 years. [or at such time as we all have 3D printers so we can purchase the article via the internet and print out the item in our homes or everything is delivered by drones regardless of where you want it delivered]

Waiters: Robots don't have an attitude, won't spill your food, and don't need tips. They can work tirelessly around the clock (don't call in sick), be ultra-efficient and be called upon by clicking a button on your menu.

Receptionist: Artificial intelligence and robotics sciences are approaching a point where the robots we can make will match humans in terms of intelligence. These robots will be our faithful servants who perform the menial tasks, so humans can focus on developing themselves. But can they be personable rather than strictly business?

Extra: Jobs that will be outsourced to countries with inexpensive labor. Yes, these jobs will still exist, but will be performed by workers in countries that can offer inexpensive, skilled labor.

Accountant

Auditor

Web designer

Engineer

Customer service (much of this has already happened)

Many high-tech jobs

It seems that job predictions for the future usually include something about freeing us up to have more leisure time to enjoy and spend with family and friends.  However, they don't say how an ever increasing world population is supposed to earn a living in an arena of decreasing jobs.

An interesting problem to ponder.

Jobs That No Longer Exist—part 1 of 2

This is certainly far removed from a complete list of obsolete jobs, but it's an interesting cross-section. Some of these jobs were prominent centuries ago and have been gone for a long time, some are much more recent. One or two of them may have existed in your lifetime. But either way, they are jobs that no longer exist.

Pre-Radar Listener

And speaking of World War II (and World War I)…during times of war in the days before radar, these listeners were people assigned to detect enemy aircraft. They did this by using acoustic mirrors and listening devices to detect the sounds of engines. (above picture)

Daguerreotypists

We've all seen photographs from back in the day showing the photographer taking a picture, whether a portrait in a studio or Matthew Brady engaged in his landmark history changing photographs from the U.S. Civil War. Prior to modern cameras and selfies, daguerreotypes were one of the earliest forms of photography. These images were made by daguerreotypists, who treated a silver-coated copper plate with light-sensitive chemicals. After exposing it in a camera and developing it with mercury, a detailed image appeared.

Ice Cutter

Back when today's electric refrigerators were referred to as ice boxes, there was a reason for it.  Highly insulated 'boxes' held a large block of ice and kept food cold (until the ice melted).  The ice man delivered the large blocks of ice door to door.  These blocks were provided by people known as ice cutters who would literally cut the huge blocks from frozen lakes. And in the summer? Mostly it was 'tough luck.'

Knocker-Up

Before you become shocked or start laughing, that's not what I'm talking about here. The knocker-up was literally a human alarm clock. A knocker-up would visit your house to make sure you got to work on time. They used a long, light stick to hit their client's doors or windows to wake them.

Rat Catcher

From several centuries ago to even just a couple of centuries ago, cities (both residential neighborhoods and industrial areas) were plagued by disease-carrying rodents. Rat catchers were the people employed to remove the vermin off the streets.

Lamplighter

Back in the day when street lights were gas, before the days of electric lamps, lamplighters would use long poles to light, extinguish and refuel street lamps to illuminate the night streets.

Gas Station:  They used to be called service stations and you actually got service. You stop to buy gas and the attendant would fill the tank for you, check your oil, check your tire pressure, and wash your windshield. Now, anything you want you have to do it yourself including putting your credit in the slot at the pump to pay. There are probably still places where someone actually fills the tank for you, but today they're few and far between and about to be gone.

Milkman

Before refrigerators existed, and even in the day of the ice box, it was hard to keep milk from going bad, especially in summer. The milkman made regular neighborhood deliveries, some extending to as recently as the 1960s. With the advent of home refrigeration and the convenience of modern supermarkets, the need for the milkman disappeared.

Switchboard Operator

At one time switchboard operators were a key part of a telephone network’s operation. Initially, anyone wanting to make even a local call needed the operator to put it through. After local dial was the norm, the operator was still required for long distance. And in businesses where numerous employees were all connected to the same company phone number, the switchboard operator was needed to direct incoming calls. But now, with billions of phone calls made every day, the job of switchboard operator would be virtually impossible.

Computer

Before you wrinkle your forehead into a frown and formulate an immediate objection to the concept of computer belonging on a 'no longer exists' list, I'm not talking about the hardware/software combination that is vital to today's society. I'm talking about a person rather than a machine. Computer was an actual job title. Before computers (the machine) became commercially available, these computers (the human workers—commonly women) performed mathematical calculations, converting and crunching numbers by hand. These 'computers' were invaluable during World War II calculating firing logistics for the artillery units at the front.

Resurrectionist

Also known as 'body snatchers' as well as grave robbers. Resurrectionists were hired to dig newly buried, fresh corpses from graveyards and sell them to universities to be used as cadavers for medical research and instruction.

And as is obvious, many of today's jobs will be obsolete at some point in time. Some of them not that far away. Check back next week for part 2 of 2 which takes a look at jobs that are soon to be considered obsolete.

THE HOUND OF THE BASKERVILLES—the real story

A couple of years ago, I was watching Castle Secrets And Legends on television. One of the segments was about Cromer Hall in England, located approximately 140 miles northeast of London. The Cabell family have been owner and residents of Cromer Hall for many decades, well over a century.

A local legend told to a visiting Arthur Conan Doyle, along with the physical description of the actual Cromer Hall built in 1829, are said to have been Doyle's inspiration for The Hound Of The Baskervilles published in 1902. Being a Sherlock Holmes fan, I was pleased when the television series aired that episode again. I augmented the information the show provided with a little research of my own starting by locating Cromer on a map.

According to a legend told to Doyle—on August 5, 1577, a large black Hound of Hell materialized in a local church and brutally mauled two people to death. The hound glared at the other people in the church with red blazing eyes, then disappeared leaving only a scorched claw mark on the stone wall to confirm its presence. The mark remains to this day. The beast was called Black Shuk and blamed for all unexplained gruesome happenings that took place from that time on.

Another legend tells of Richard Cabell, a 17th century country squire. After seriously mistreating a village girl, he was chased by wild hounds until he died of a heart attack. Considered to have been an evil man and feared by the local villagers, they entombed his body in a small building by the church and placed a heavy stone slab on top of his grave so he couldn't escape.

The Cabell family has their own version of this legend. Richard Cabell believed his wife had been unfaithful. He chased her out into the night and viciously stabbed her to death. Her loyal dog retaliated by tearing him to pieces.

Doyle took the basics of the three legends along with a detailed description of Cromer Hall, and transported it all to Dartmoor. And the name he gave to the family cursed with the presence of a Hound From Hell due to an ancestor's misdeeds? The coachman who drove Arthur Conan Doyle to Cromer Hall that fateful day for his visit was a man named…Henry Baskerville.

The huge popularity of the story continues today. Devotees of The Hound Of The Baskervilles often dress in period clothes, including the infamous deerstalker cap, and search Dartmoor for the origins of the story.

They do need to keep in mind that it's a fictional story, not a documentary.

From The Book Of Useless Information—part 3 of 3

This is the final week of my three trivia blogs featuring bits and pieces from The Book Of Useless Information, an official publication of The Useless Information Society with a copyright of 2006.  I'm picking some items at random from the last few sections of the book.  And there is one fact that jumped out at me as being absolutely wrong…I have attributed it to an overlooked typo rather than misinformation.  I'll share this with you in a little while.

For now…I'll pick up here where I left off last week.

AMAZING DISCOVERIES:  Construction workers' hard hats were invented and first used in the construction of Hoover Dam in 1933.  Thomas Edison, credited with the light bulb (he didn't actually invent the light bulb, he created a filament that lasted long enough to make the light bulb viable), was afraid of the dark.  A normal raindrop falls at about seven miles an hour.  An inch of snow falling evenly on one acre of ground is equivalent to about 2,715 gallons of water.  A cubic mile of fog is made up of less than a gallon of water.  Meteorologists claim they're right 85 percent of the time.  Buzz Aldrin's mother's maiden name was Moon.  The Apollo 11 moon lander had only twenty seconds of fuel left when it landed.  A manned rocket can reach the moon in less time than it took a stagecoach to travel the length of England.  Stars come in different colors—hot stars give off blue light and the cooler ones give off red light.  Earth is traveling through space at 660,000 miles per hour.  By weight, the sun is 70 percent hydrogen, 28 percent helium, 1.5 percent carbon-nitrogen-oxygen, and 0.5 percent all other elements.  A bolt of lightning can strike the earth with the equivalent of one hundred million volts and generate temperatures five times hotter than those found on the sun's surface.  In 1949, Popular Mechanics said computers of the future would weigh no more than five tons.  The shortest commercial intercontinental flight in the world is from Gibraltar in Europe to Tangier in Africa, a distance of thirty-four miles and flight time of twenty minutes.  A large flawless emerald is worth more than a similarly large flawless diamond.  A jiffy is an actual unit of time the equivalent of one-hundredth of a second.

WILD KINGDOM:  A baby blue whale is twenty-five feet long at birth.  In 1859 twenty-four rabbits were released in Australia and within six years the population grew to two million.  Human beings and the two-toed sloth are the only land animals that typically mate face to face.  An estimated 80 percent of all creatures on Earth have six legs.  A square mile of fertile earth has thirty-two million earthworms in it.  The original name for butterfly was the flutterby.  Grasshoppers have white blood.  A single strand from the golden spider's web is as strong as a steel wire of the same size.  Contrary to common belief, reptiles are never slimy, their scales have few glands and are usually silky to the touch.  The gecko lizard can run on the ceiling without falling because its toes have flaps of skin that act like suction cups.  Alligators cannot move backward.  The only continent without reptiles or snakes is Antarctica.  A group of frogs is called an army.  A group of kangaroos is called a mob.  Male monkeys lose the hair on their heads in the same manner as men do.  It is physically impossible for pigs to look up at the sky.  Bats are the only mammals that can fly.  Time and erosion have erased 99 percent of all dinosaur footprints.  Reindeer like to eat bananas.  Moose have very poor vision, some have even tried to mate with cars.  The night vision of tigers is six times better than that of humans.  Jaguars are scared of dogs.  Walking catfish of Florida can stay out of the water for eighty days.  Shark's fossil records date back more than twice as far as those of the dinosaurs.  Sea otters have the world's densest fur—a million hairs per square inch.

STATISTICS:  It would take more than 150 years to drive a car to the sun.  More than 10 percent of all the salt produced annually in the world is used in winter to de-ice American roads.  Most fatal car accidents happen on a Saturday.  The world record for carrying a milk bottle on your head is twenty-four miles.  You're more likely to be killed by a champagne cork than a poisonous spider.  About 6 percent of murdered American men are killed by either their wife or girlfriend…or their wife who caught them with their girlfriend.  Experienced waitresses say that married men tip better than unmarried men.  You are more likely to get attacked by a cow than a shark.

And on the last page of The Book Of Useless Information, it says:  approximately 97 percent of all statistics are made up.  :)

And back on the first of these three trivia blogs, that error I said I caught?  It was in the first section of HALL OF FAME.  It said, "In 1812, after being shot in the chest, Theodore Roosevelt finished a speech he was delivering before he accepted any medical help."  The incident is true, but Teddy Roosevelt wasn't even born until 1858.  The reality is that it happened on October 14, 1912, a century later.  As I said, certainly a typo that no one caught.