Whether Deity or Demon, the supernatural entities of the
ancient world had one thing in common.
More often than not, they used their magical skills for the pursuit of
sex…lots of it.
In today's world, someone with the powers attributed to the
gods and monsters of ancient mythology might ideally use those abilities to
banish ignorance, intolerance, and hate to make the world a better place for
everyone. But in the ancient world, the
rulers of mythology used their special powers for a far more down-to-earth
human type pursuit—that of participating in hot sex as often as possible.
Here are six such immortals from the ancient world who seem
to be in a perpetual state of heat, always chasing after the pleasures derived
from seducing mortals.
6) Zeus:
The ancient Greeks didn't have reality television and the internet, but
they did have the exploits of Zeus, king of the gods, to keep them
entertained. Zeus wasn't at all
picky. He engaged in sex with goddesses,
nymphs, and mortals and did whatever it took to get what he wanted. Kinky, freaky, voracious. It all described his sexual appetite. On one occasion he even took on the physical
appearance of the husband of a human woman named Alcmene and they had a son
named Heracles (Hercules in Roman mythology).
But even the king of the gods ended up in trouble on the home front. High up on Mt. Olympus, his wife, Hera, was a
woman of earth-shattering powers and didn't hesitate to use them.
5) The Incubus/Succubus: Today wet dreams are easily explained. In medieval times, however, they were
believed to be the result of demonic forces.
Folklore from centuries ago says there was a demonic creature whose sole
purpose was to have sex with people during their sleep. The incubus put a spell on a woman to make
her compliant then proceeded to have his way with her. The succubus was the female version of this
demon who seduced men in their sleep.
Sex with an incubus or succubus was considered dangerous for the mortal,
but not always lethal. A one time only
encounter said the mortal would most likely survive. But continued encounters with the same mortal
were definitely bad for the mortal's health.
4) Odin:
King of the Norse gods, Odin only had one eye. He traded the other one for infinite
wisdom. And what knowledge did this
infinite wisdom impart to him? It said
hot sex was a lot of fun. One time he
found himself really turned on by a female giant named Jord. He refused to allow the fact that his
non-giant manhood was dwarfed by her giant body to stand in his way. He figured out a physical means for them to
have sex. Nine months later Thor was
born.
3) Krishna:
The Hindu god Krishna wasn't only about hot sex and good times. When his good-for-nothing uncle, Kamsa,
crossed that hypothetical line in the
sand one too many times, Krishna put him six feet under the sand without
giving it a second thought. Krishna loved
to get freaky with the ladies. He had a
flute and when he played it women would flock to him.
2) Pan:
The Greek god, Pan, had a goat-like appearance. He would have fit in perfectly with one of
today's college frat houses—he was all about partying. He liked to drink and was cursed (or blessed,
depending on how you look at it) with an intense sex drive. He often ran around with his bare erection
visible for all to see. Like Krishna, he
used his magic flute to draw in the ladies.
He seduced Selene, the moon goddess, and convinced her that having sex
with him was a great idea.
1) The Meek-Moos-Ak: The Native American tribe known as the
Abenaki believed in these short twin creatures called the Meek-moos-ak. They ran around drunk, killing hunters and
having sex with women. Their legend said
that once a woman had sex with them, she was cursed to never desire marriage.
So, the moral of this story is that should you find yourself
covered in a strange substance and it gives you the power to shape-shift or
play a mean flute, use it for sex. After
all, everyone else did. :)
8 comments:
Thanks for the laughs and the information this morning! Enjoyed your post.
These are really funny!
As you said, these lusty tales of the old gods must've been very entertaining for the people. Thanks for another interesting post.
Cat
I've always loved mythology, especially Greek and Roman. When I was 14 I got up at 6:30 a.m. to watch a PBS class on it! I think the thing to remember is that most ancient cultures had gods who were very human, except for their supernatural powers. And so they experienced the same emotions and desires as we do. They were jealous, spiteful and driven by a lust for power and sex. But they also had some of the good qualities we have, only a larger-than-life scale. It's only recently (in terms of human history) that we've imagined our deities with truly noble attributes. And even then, look at all the violence in the world that happens in the name of religion these days. And yet, I believe that we need religion and deities, some sense of a life above and beyond us. It's something humans appeared to have developed many hundreds of thousands of years ago, along with art and symbolic language. It is part of what makes us human. Great blog!
Ashantay: Glad you enjoyed my blog.
Thanks for your comment.
Jennifer: Glad you enjoyed them.
Thanks for your comment.
Cat: Glad you enjoyed my blog.
Thanks for your comment.
Mary: Yes, I agree. Ancient humans created their gods in human form, gave them human attributes but on a greatly elevated level...more-bigger-better than the capabilities of mere humans. The creation of the gods and ancient forms of religion was necessary in many instances to explain things that seemed to by miracles, things they didn't understand, things that were eventually explained by science.
Thanks for your comment.
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