Sunday, June 26, 2011

10 Things NOT To Say At A Job Interview

We all know that going on a job interview is cause for varying degrees of nervous tension. We're uncomfortable, very concerned about making a good impression both personally and with our resume and work history. Saying the wrong thing…misspeaking…is upper in our mind.

All of this discomfort is part of the process. But, there are those who go beyond the bounds of mere jittery nerves. I recently came across an article about job interviews. The following comments were listed as having actually been said during the course of a job interview.

Q: Why did you leave your last job?
A: "I have a problem with authority."

Q: Why should we hire you?
A: "I would be a great asset to the events team because I party all the time."

Q: Do you have any questions?
A: "Cross dressing isn't a problem, is it?"

Q: Why are you leaving your current job?
A: "I was fired from my last job because they were forcing me to attend anger management classes."

Q: Why do you want to work for us?
A: "My old boss didn't like me, so one day I just left and never came back. And here I am!"

Q: What are your weaknesses? [related to job skills]
A: "I get angry easily and I went to jail for domestic violence. But I won't get mad at you."

Q: When have you demonstrated leadership skills?
A: "Well my best example would be in the world of online video gaming. I pretty much run the show. It takes a lot to do that."

Q: Is there anything else I should know about you?
A: "You should probably know I mud wrestle on the weekends."

Q: When can you start?
A: "I need to check with my mom on that one."

Q: Have you submitted your two weeks' notice to your current employer?
A: "What is two weeks' notice? I've never quit a job before. I've always been fired."

The following are random responses and comments made by job seekers at interviews.

"If I get an offer, how long do I have before I have to take the drug test?"

"When you do background checks on candidates, do things like public drunkenness arrests come up?"

"May I have a cup of coffee? I think I may still be a little drunk from last night."

Do you have any job seeking experiences you'd like to share…either as the interviewer or the interviewee?


Lilly Gayle said...

These are too funny. When I worked for the state, I was once interviewing for an x-ray tech. (I was the rad. dept. manager) The woman's cell phone rang during the interview. She held up her finger and said, "It's my boyfriend. I need to take this."
I raised my eyebrows, but she answered the phone anyway, and then had the nerve to look at me an ask if she could have some privacy! I stepped out a minute and when I went back into the office, I simply thanked her for coming in. She asked when she'd hear something about the job. I told her not to expect a call anytime soon. I don't think she got it...

Samantha Gentry said...

Lilly: LOL...hard to believe that someone wanting a job would take a call from her boyfriend and then actually ask the interviewer to leave her own office. As you said...she didn't get it. Otherwise she would have had her phone turned off during the interview. Boggles the mind. :)

Amy said...

Astounding. I work as a retail manager. I had a girl once tell me before the interview that her friend told her she had to dress up. So she did--she was wearing yoga pants, flip-flops, a t shirt and had her hair in a ponytail. She did have on eye shadow--bright blue eye shadow. Perhaps that's what she meant by dressing up. But her friend worked at J Crew and was going to give her his discount in order for her to buy some new clothes. sharing is a no-no in the retail world. My asst manager had to interview her anyway, but needless to say she didn't get the job!
Thanks for sharing--hi-larious!

Cara Marsi said...

These are hilarious. Thanks. I can't believe people are so clueless without any common sense, but they are. At my old job, we once had a job applicant come in wearing jeans and flip flops. It's amazing that people don't have some sense of how to dress.

Keena Kincaid said...

I've had some very amusing interviews, but I'll tell a story on myself. I interviewed with with a large, international corporation last summer, and my allergies were destroying me at the time. During the interviewing I took a drink of water, then coughed, spewing water all over my leather portfolio binder.

There was a moment of silence, then I said: well, that's mortifying.

Everyone laughed and the interview continued. I was invited back for several more rounds after that. I didn't get the job, but then no one did. The company decided not to fill the position at the time.

Samantha Gentry said...

Amy: Another good example that really makes me scratch my head and wonder where that person's head was. Thanks for sharing.

Samantha Gentry said...

Cara: It really is unbelievable that there are people out there walking around who are so totally clueless. Thanks for your comment.

Samantha Gentry said...

Keena: LOL...oh, how embarrasing. But other than that "minor mishap" you obviously presented yourself well that they continued to have you back. Thanks for stopping by.

Mona Risk said...

As a director of an analytical division, I used to interview applicants almost every week. I remember a guy telling me: "You mean you really want to hire me?" He repeated it three or four times. I was about to change my mind and tell him no. He turned out to be a very good chemist although quite introvert and unable to communicate with others, which suited me well in the lab. He was always busy working and never chattting with others.

Another time a pretty girl interviewed. She had no degree in chemistry and had never worked in a lab, but she thought she had a lot of exprerience, because she worked in a beauty saloon and knew a lot about chemicals used for hair perm and haircoloring. I gave her a chance to be a technician. She learned quickly and did well.

Samantha Gentry said...

Mona: It's interesting the way the least likely applicants sometimes turn out to be the most viable employees. Thanks for commenting.

Lynne Roberts said...

Thanks Samantha,

I've had my fair share of interviews (on both sides of the desk) but nothing quite so funny... there was the exotic dancer who was applying for a job in Accounts Receivable with no other experience...

Any way, great post!

Samantha Gentry said...

Lynne: An exotic dancer in accounts receivable...maybe she thought she had a fool proof method of collecting money? :) Thanks for commenting.